Drivers

[RoddingRon]

This may be a little bit of a long read, but I hope you get some enjoyment out of it. It took me a long time to finally get this on paper[P


Everyone who drives has encountered those special drivers, that for whatever reason, drive you nuts. I'm not a professional driver like some of you out there, but doing field service work for the better part of 10 years, I've put many miles on company vehicles. During those years, I've covered a lot of miles and have seen a lot of different types of drivers. I saw so many that I mentally started to catagorize them. The following are a couple of those catagories with the description. For the most part, the descriptions, will be for traveling on a four lane highway as a minimum. Six and eight lane highways also apply. Also, I used it alot, so we're going to make the assumption that your using your cruise control and driving at a steady speed.

So, we'll start with the basics...


Tailgater - You know the clown that comes flying up behind you and parks on your rear bumper, even though there is an open lane to go around you. Along with this common driver, you may encounter a similar driver I call the...


Coat Tail rider - This is the driver that no matter what you do, they seem to just sit behind you. You can speed up and they speed up, you slow down and they slow down. This can go on for miles and miles until you reach your exit (or they reach theirs). Do not mistake this driver for the....


Pacer - The Pacer will come up behind you and lock on to you until you get passed by someone traveling at a faster speed then you are driving. The Pacer will then jump out from behind you and pace off them. If your lucky as you catch and pass another car, the Pacer may latch on to that car.


Pacer take 2 - This is the driver that we learn about aerodynamics from. You know when you are in the passing lane coming up on a car and that big wall of air your car is pushing out of the way, starts pushing the car your trying to pass and all of a sudden they are running the same speed as you (thanks to that aero push...I'm sure of it). Then there is the opposite effect, when you pass a car and that vacuum your car creates sucks in the other car and holds them there... usually right off your right rear fender...in the blind spot.

Next is the...


Recoil Racer(you remember the wind up cars you had as a kid...they'd fly at first then as the spring unwinds they get progressively slower) - This is the driver that comes flying up behind you and blows past you. On occasion, a few miles down the road you'll have the pleasure of passing the same driver while they tool along 20 mph slower then your traveling. For me over the years, I usually had the luck of having the Recoil Racer blow past me then pull in right in front of me just as the spring starts to unwind, so as soon as they pass, that quick they are in your way and you have to pass them......BUT....don't worry they'll blow back past you again further down the road.

The following is the one that probably annoyed me the most...


The Creeper - This is the one who waits until your almost beside them to pull into the passing lane to pass the truck they've been following for the last 10 miles. Only problem is the truck they're pasing is going 10 mph below the posted speed and they "creep" past the truck 1/2 mph faster then the truck is moving. Normally they will also wait until they are far enough past the truck that you are thinking about moving in to the right hand lane to pass them, before they finally put on the turn signal and begin they're return to the right lane and let you past. On occasion what you really encountered was a Recoil Racer (see above) who just rewound the spring as they pulled in front of the truck, and will blast off into the future and leave you sitting there. Just be careful when you get further down the road, because you might be lucky enough to catch them again when they are passing another truck (Yes, it did happen to me)

The final "specialist" is the ...


Top Gun Pilot (or sometimes also referred to as the Mario Andretti). This is the one who flys in and out of traffic like Tom Cruise in Top Gun or Like Mario used to do to the competition in his early days. They have to get where they are going before they even know where they are going, because they are in that much of a hurry. Fortunately these are also the ones who bring the biggest smile to my face....when I pass them while while they are explaining to the nice officer where they were going in such a hurry

 

[Old Iron]

:d [p

 

[donsrods]

Here in Florida we get every one of those, and some not mentioned. People come here from every other State and evidently there are ways of driving and rules that are different from State to State so you get people doing stuff you never expect.

The one that bugs me the most is the driver who is turning left at an intersection,and when the light changes so he can go he drives so slow that only he and maybe one other car gets through the light before it changes red again. Down here the lights only stay green for so long and you have to move or else you sit through 2 or 3 light changes before you get your turn.

Don

 

[old man dave]

Thats funny but you forgot The Regulator that regulates the speed everyone is driving. Only happens when you are in a hurry.

 

[gassersgarage]

Here in Florida we get every one of those, and some not mentioned. People come here from every other State and evidently there are ways of driving and rules that are different from State to State so you get people doing stuff you never expect.

The one that bugs me the most is the driver who is turning left at an intersection,and when the light changes so he can go he drives so slow that only he and maybe one other car gets through the light before it changes red again. Down here the lights only stay green for so long and you have to move or else you sit through 2 or 3 light changes before you get your turn.

Don

That's because Florida has so many retirees......LOL

 

[Dr Crankenstein]

A few of my own titles...

The Hunter - Usually found at a T intersection, he waits patiently for his opportunity to spear you. Almost became a T-bone dinner for one, he forced me right off the highway.

The Scientist - An expert in fuel efficency, aerodynamics, and carries a coin purse. Driving into a strong headwind, I had this clown in a Smart car "drafting" me. Once I realised what he was up to, I stomped the go pedal and switched lanes. He fell off like he struck flypaper.

The Phobic - A person scared to death of moving objects. Two-handed death grip on the wheel, eyes straight ahead, 10 MPH under the limit. I don't mess with them, they're clearly suffering from trauma already.

Some people should stick to the bus.

 

[Willowbilly3]

My opinion of the human race is always it's lowest when I am in traffic.
Fortunately, where I live now are the most considerate drivers of anyplace I have lived or driven. The closer you get to the metro's, the ruder and stupider people seem to be.
Here in this small town we have the old and "too polite" people that just don't grasp the concept of a 4 way stop and want to let a few extra cars go before the creep on out. And the people who aren't quite sure you will know enough to stop so they wait until you do so to take their turn.

 

[RoddingRon]

A few of my own titles...

The Hunter - Usually found at a T intersection, he waits patiently for his opportunity to spear you. Almost became a T-bone dinner for one, he forced me right off the highway.

The Scientist - An expert in fuel efficency, aerodynamics, and carries a coin purse. Driving into a strong headwind, I had this clown in a Smart car "drafting" me. Once I realised what he was up to, I stomped the go pedal and switched lanes. He fell off like he struck flypaper.

The Phobic - A person scared to death of moving objects. Two-handed death grip on the wheel, eyes straight ahead, 10 MPH under the limit. I don't mess with them, they're clearly suffering from trauma already.

Some people should stick to the bus.

And so the list will grow!

One I forgot is the L.L. Richard. We have lots of them around here...that's the one who pull out into the passing lane as soon as humanly possible, then parks there. You know, "this is my lane and I'm going to drive my speed in it and I don't care if it's less then the speed limit...you can go around in the other lane."

Oh by the way.. L(eft) L(ane) R(short name for Richard...R becomes a D)

 

[motrhd]

RR, sounds like you've been driving in Michigan..........

Also, from what you stated, by definition, you are, or were a professional driver.

 

[izzy]

I seem to be always overloaded and I love when some clown pulls out in front of me on a two lane blacktop only to turn in front of me 1 mile ahead. That way my brakes get a really good workout.

 

[Sam_Fear]

Mr. Cruise Control! - Wouldn't wanna put your foot on that pedal a little to let the rest of us get around that semi.

Illinois is the worst for LL Richards.

Cruise Control battles - where your both going the same speed, but your cruise controls don't match up going up or down hills.

 

[Dr Crankenstein]

LL Richard. [cl Last name? Head.

Here on the wind whipped prairies, you pass a semi as quickly as possible. (At least I do) Those boys have their hands full keepin' it between the ditches, they don't need you hangin' out in their blind spot for 5 miles.

Under the same windy conditions, one can often encounter another highway hero....

The Captain - A person who falsely believes he can guide an RV the size of Noah's Ark, 5th wheel hotel flappin' about like a landed fish. Pass this guy faster than a scrap truck 'cuz somethin's gonna fly off.

 

[lowbuckrats]

Most of what I encounter around here is the...
I OWN THE ROAD SLOW-POKE. Do I really have to explain this one? These are the a-holes that usually cut you off, purposely drive ultra slow, don't care about who's behind them or around them for that matter. They also purposely drive slower when anyone gets behind them. They also sit at green lights and then after a while decide to putt along. Then,sometimes, when you do have a chance to pass them, they speed up and try and race you and almost cause an accident. I think the biggest problem on the roads today is no consideration for others at all. It wasnt like this back when I first started driving. People generally made way or pulled to the right if they wanted to drive slower. I believe more people are generally rude and dont care about anything else or their surroundings anymore. It came along with the cell-phone age. I may sound bitter but that's the way it really is in my area.

 

[motrhd]

I hear ya lowbuck, I distinctly remember being taught that the use of turn signals was a drivers way of communicating to those around them their intentions, nobody uses them anymore, it's a guessing game...

 

[maverickmk]

The Phobic - A person scared to death of moving objects. Two-handed death grip on the wheel, eyes straight ahead, 10 MPH under the limit. I don't mess with them, they're clearly suffering from trauma already.

This pin head - at least here in Florida - is the one that turns their hazards on at the slightest drop of rain. These people pi$$ me off to no end

If they think it's that bad, pull off the road and let the rest of us get on with our lives!

 

[Sam_Fear]

LL Richard. [cl Last name? Head.

Here on the wind whipped prairies, you pass a semi as quickly as possible. (At least I do) Those boys have their hands full keepin' it between the ditches, they don't need you hangin' out in their blind spot for 5 miles.

My wife had a tendency to start to pass semi's but kind of hang right at the trailer wheels. !!!! I finally pointed out if anything happens that trailer is gonna be in my lap.

 

[junker39]

The I WAS HERE FIRST GUYI had an older guy,(mid 80s), that was a regular customer at my shop. He had a fairly well original 63 Ford pickup. He'd bought it new at the local dealer. He had lived in that small town all his life and was under the impression that he was there first, and those signs and lights were meant for everyone that moved to town after the signs were installed. I rode to his house with him one time, to bring the truck back to the shop. He didn't even slow down for Yield or Stop signs. Didn't even look before crossing through. I wasn't real scared until we crossed Highway 59, a busy,divided, 4-lane 80mph, tractor trailer infested, death road. We just went right on thru both Stop signs and kept on cruising at the usual 30mph. I ain't been right since. And that was my first and only time I rode in that old truck.

 

[Rat'l Trap]

I'm probably guilty of being Mario Andretti after getting so frustrated following every other type listed above for 30 miles. The one that gets to me bad is on a 2 lane road, long straightaway, and someone sees me coming and has to pull out in front of me when I'm goin 50, hit the brakes waiting for them to get up to speed. If they had waited 10 seconds longer, I would have gone past them and they could have then pulled onto the road and effected no one. Inconsiderate POS.