Endless BS thread

[oldmanb]

[cl[cl[cl[cl



good one E-man!


on a side note, today is the day me & the wife go for first round of marriage counseling/therapy... i just wonder how much is gonna hit the fan...

Good for you folks! The big step is in going,been there with wife #2,best thing that ever happened to me,and yes we're still together, stronger then ever.
Hope the best for you both!,Brian

 

[bob w]

Disappointment

Get the popcorn, here's my sad tale [P[P[P

The local (90 miles away) dragstrip runs roughly every other week. Two weeks ago I have everything packed and ready to go for early Saturday morning.

Friday afternoon it looks like my 14 year old friend, Willie the arrogant Standard Poodle is dying. He is panting just lying on the floor. I had to help him to his feet so he could go outside to do his duty. Willie isn't happy to have me lifting his arthritic front quarters and hind quarters to get him standing. Bit me three times. Doesn't take me long to catch on, I put a heavy jacket on so he could bite the sleeve and not me. Like you see in the police dog training films.

So I stayed home to take care of Willie in his last hours. Of course, by Sunday he had recovered but I missed Saturday Test and Tune.

Yesterday I had everything packed and ready for another assault on the strip. My friends Lee & Terry were hoping to run in the 9's for the first time ever, having run a 10.18 two weeks prior. I was excited to crack well into the 10's based on some advice from my drag racing brother in Kansas.

About midnight I took the 3 dogs out for their "last call". Me too, if you must know. We 4 came in the house and I kicked off my left shoe. When I kicked off my right shoe an excruciating jolt of pain shot from my ankle to my hip, almost dropping me to the floor. It has happened twice before in the last three years so I knew (or assumed) it wasn't going to be the end of me.

Took 10 minutes to make it up the stairs & several more minutes to make it into bed. With each step it felt like an electric shock was going through my leg. I did find a sleeping position that didn't hurt too much. About 3:00am my eyes popped open and that scourge of many old men was apparent; a bathroom call. Each step was accompanied by a muffled gasp as the pain stabbed through my lower leg. Finally made it back to bed with the realization that another attempt to go racin' was over.

So here I sit, in front of my dusty old 'puter, whining like the immature 70 year old baby that I am. Looking for sympathy from by cyber-buddies.

The last Test and Tune of the season is in two weeks. Already I'm dreading what might happen.

All hooked up and unable to go.

 

[CR55]

Hang in there Bob... hopefully you'll recover in time to make a run. Keep us posted.

 

[maverickmk]

Wow, that just sucks. But I have to admit my favorite part is: "Bit me three times. Doesn't take me long to catch on . . . "

 

[hotrod preacher]

sorry to hear of the unfortunate turn of events, bob... maybe you'll make it yet... hope you get to feelin better

and when ya make it, tell us all about it-inquiring minds want to know!

 

[earthman]

What's going on with the leg?That doesn't sound like arthritis.

 

[fuzz]

Bob: You're not whinning, you're sharing your personal life & emotions with us & we appreicate that. From reading your posts over the years we've come to know that you are a genuinely nice guy and we care about you & want you to know that.
I feel your pain, litteraly. Arthritus is attaching my body as well, I just can't do things I used to do & have to make adjustments, it's a fact of life. I recently buried my buddy Shorty, he had been with us for 11 years & my other pal Barney is 12 years old & not doing well these days.I try not to get too depressed & take heart in knowing that in the next life there will be no pain or sorrow.
I'll pray for you & think about you & look forward to the pictures you'll post after you get to the track & have fun with the hot rod....

 

[RAT IHC]

Everything happens for a reason my friend...it just wasn't in the cards this weekend.

 

[Gastrick]

Glad to hear he's OK. What'd he hit - a truck? Looks like the bumper went under. No airbag blew?

Bob W. What a sad tale. I'm depressed for you just reading it. Hang in there pal.

Sam, His car is lowered (I'm sure you can relate to that) so he ran underneath the late model Ford in front of him (that stopped at a green light[S). Just heard from the insurance company. They wrote the damage at $10,500 and want to total it. We are trying to work out a deal with them where we get the car back and fix it. He has an aftermarket steering wheel in there so there was no airbag to blow.

 

[Bonehead]

bob, sorry to hear of it. Sometimes you just have to do the best you can, and if you can't you can't. I am sure things will come around. They generally do.

Gas, Maybe a rusty old body with that running gear? Could be fun.

 

[hotrod preacher]

alright, i must give an update... the 1st counselor/therapist canceled on a last minute "illness" call, and then could not schedule us on a day that both me & wife were free... on to second therapist/counselor... a good feeling about this one, and she offered a "free consultation" as a "professional courtesy" to us since i am a minister/pastor. [cl

today is the day for the first trip in this new adventure, things going good on the home-front right now...i think the wifey just had to get a little radical to get my attention, but believe me she has my attention now!

 

[fuzz]

alright, i must give an update... the 1st counselor/therapist canceled on a last minute "illness" call, and then could not schedule us on a day that both me & wife were free... on to second therapist/counselor... a good feeling about this one, and she offered a "free consultation" as a "professional courtesy" to us since i am a minister/pastor. [cl

today is the day for the first trip in this new adventure, things going good on the home-front right now...i think the wifey just had to get a little radical to get my attention, but believe me she has my attention now!

You do what ya gotta do to work it out.....GOD don't like the D word!!!.
Good luck!.

 

[sgtpontiac]

Communication is the key....

alright, i must give an update... the 1st counselor/therapist canceled on a last minute "illness" call, and then could not schedule us on a day that both me & wife were free... on to second therapist/counselor... a good feeling about this one, and she offered a "free consultation" as a "professional courtesy" to us since i am a minister/pastor. [cl

today is the day for the first trip in this new adventure, things going good on the home-front right now...i think the wifey just had to get a little radical to get my attention, but believe me she has my attention now!

God bless and hope that you two can work it out....sometimes it's a hard road....but the Lord never said life would be easy...he just said he'd be there with us through it all....

 

[CR55]

Hang in there HRP...You can do it....

 

[hotrod preacher]

thanks guys, i appreciate the support...

it was about as brutal as i expected, but i think we can make it...interesting adventure to say the least...

 

[maverickmk]

Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee in St. Peter's Square.

The first Catholic man tells his friends, "My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'."

The second Catholic man chirps, "My son is a Bishop. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Grace'."

The third Catholic gent says, "My son is a Cardinal. When he enters a room everyone bows their head and says 'Your Eminence'."

The fourth Catholic man says very proudly, "My son is the Pope. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Holiness'."

Since the lone Catholic woman was sipping her coffee in silence, the four men give her a subtle, "Well....?".

She proudly replies, "I have a daughter, slim, tall, 38D breasts, 24" waist and 36" hips. When she walks into a room, people say, "Oh My God".

 

[maverickmk]

A surgeon went to check on his blonde patient after an operation. She was awake, so he examined her. "You'll be fine," he said.

She asked, "How long will it be before I am able to have a normal sex life again doctor?"

The surgeon seemed to pause, which alarmed the girl.

"What's the matter Doctor? I will be all right, won't I?"

He replied, "Yes, you'll be fine. It's just that no one has ever asked me that after having their tonsils out."

 

[maverickmk]

A fifteen year old Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again.

The boy asked, 'What is this Father?'

The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, 'Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is.'

While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat old lady in a wheel chair moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened, and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small numbers above the walls light up sequentially.

They continued to watch until it reached the last number, and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order. Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous 24-year-old blond stepped out.

The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to his son, 'Go get your Mother!'

 

[maverickmk]

A man is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker is wearing an earring. The man knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden change in "fashion sense."

The man walks up to him and says, "I didn't know you were into earrings."

"Don't make such a big deal, it's only an earring," he replies sheepishly.

His friend falls silent for a few minutes, but then his curiosity prods him to ask, "So, how long have you been wearing one?"

"Ever since my wife found it in my truck."

 

[CR55]

Suffered through a bout of food poisoning last night...stayed with me most of the day...still had to work though...longest night of my life..and I get to go camping this weekend with my sons scout troop!! Whoopeeeeee, sleeping on the ground in northeast october weather. if this sounds sarcastic...it is! !!