Getting Old isn't for sissies

[MercuryMac]

My condolences Dozer. A few years ago I lost my Mum in the same way. I also had the conflicting thoughts; she had been your bright eyed bushy-tailed Mum and now she is gone forever, but, she had a terrible disease that caused her suffering and now she's not suffering anymore.
You will do lots of thinking, some of it all jumbled up, over the next few months. My heart goes out to you.

 

[DozerII]

Thanks you so much everyone on here, your comments and thoughts help a lot.

 

[redidbull]

Sorry for the loss of your Mom. But when you know it was for the better it doesn't hurt quite as bad.

When my Mom passed in 2012 I thought it was odd that I was not as sad as I always figured I would be. She had Parkinson's for nearly 10 years. I figured it must have been the fact that her suffering was over. I still do miss her and my Dad every day. Jim

 

[dutch]

When my Mom passed in 2012 I thought it was odd that I was not as sad as I always figured I would be. She had Parkinson's for nearly 10 years. I figured it must have been the fact that her suffering was over. I still do miss her and my Dad every day. Jim

I can relate to that. Old age is worth nothing if there`s no quality left. My mom was 57 when she died but I was "glad" it was over.
My dad just dropped dead @ 46. That felt unfair. I guess he was needed elsewhere.

I always felt kinda jealous seeing others having fun with old parents and having grandparents for their kids, but they also get the crappy parts of old age...

 

[bob w]

I'm pretty old, coming up on 80 in a few short months. When you're young, thinking about being old is discouraging. Aging brings on the obvious difficulties and one cannot judge how one will accept the challenges of aging.
I find that loss of strength, reduced vision and hearing along with aches and pain are annoyances and can be dealt with. But there is a melancholy that happens when thinking about the horrible, life threatening (ending) diseases that come with advanced age.
Knowing that the "finish line" is within sight is bothersome and keeps cropping up in one's mind.
Just how much function is a person able to cope with before saying "enough"? That's an individual choice. I've had severely crippled friends that couldn't even feed themselves that still found enjoyment in their lives.
For me, I think I could handle a great deal of physical function loss. The mind is a different matter. Without mental sharpness life is simply existence. That's my greatest worry.

 

[kenny c]

I'm pretty old, coming up on 80 in a few short months. When you're young, thinking about being old is discouraging. Aging brings on the obvious difficulties and one cannot judge how one will accept the challenges of aging.
I find that loss of strength, reduced vision and hearing along with aches and pain are annoyances and can be dealt with. But there is a melancholy that happens when thinking about the horrible, life threatening (ending) diseases that come with advanced age.
Knowing that the "finish line" is within sight is bothersome and keeps cropping up in one's mind.
Just how much function is a person able to cope with before saying "enough"? That's an individual choice. I've had severely crippled friends that couldn't even feed themselves that still found enjoyment in their lives.
For me, I think I could handle a great deal of physical function loss. The mind is a different matter. Without mental sharpness life is simply existence. That's my greatest worry.

Agreed. I'll be 57 next month, not that old. The aches and pains I have now and loss of strength and arthritis. suck. I work around all of that but the fear of mental decline is terrifying. I have such a strong family history of it. I feel it is only a matter of time. So for as long as I can I'm trying to enjoy life.

 

[Torchie]

Sending you and your family peace and strength. Dozer.
Torchie

 

[soltz]

My condolences Dozer!

 

[DozerII]

Sending you and your family peace and strength. Dozer.
Torchie

My condolences Dozer!

Thanks Guys

 

[BillM]

So sorry to learn of your loss Dozer, my condolences.

 

[williej45]

When our dad passed, my brother said the smartest thing that I’ve ever heard fall out of his mouth.
“We ain’t sad for him, we’re sad for us.”

 

[DozerII]

So sorry to learn of your loss Dozer, my condolences.

Thanks Bill sorry I missed your post.

When our dad passed, my brother said the smartest thing that I’ve ever heard fall out of his mouth.
“We ain’t sad for him, we’re sad for us.”

Isn't that the truth.

 

[DozerII]

First I want to say thank you to all of you my extended family I never met. There have been a lot of sad stories and family losses on our site in the last year or so.. After a terrible year of pain and suffering for my Dad, he has gone on to a better place.

 

[bob w]

So sorry, Glen. While we mourn the loss of a loved one, knowing that that person no longer suffers is some consolation.

 

[05snopro440]

Somehow I missed this entire thread. I'm very sorry for the loss of your mom and most recent loss of your dad, Glen.

When my friend recently was ill and hadn't yet passed, a coworker commented on how it was sad that the Covid restrictions kept visitors very limited for people who were ill and in care. I told her I wasn't as upset about that as I was about the 2 years of adventures and vacations with my friend that I missed due to Covid. I got to visit with my friend before he passed and it was great, but the most cherished memories for me happened long before he got sick at all.

I say this because I think it relates to your parents who it sounds like both had some loss of themselves in their final years, and it probably feels similar like some opportunities for connection were taken from you. Luckily, I'm sure you have years of memories that will be the most important ones to remember them by.

Colin

 

[forbigpicture]

Sorry for your loss Dozer....

 

[soltz]

Sorry for your loses

 

[redidbull]

Very sorry to hear of your Dad's passing. RIP Sir. Jim

 

[I-R-POPS]

Heart felt condolences for your loss Brother.
Living with daily pain sucks for all concerned and when it comes to an end, if people are honest about it, it's a relief for everyone.

Remember his good days and your time with him.
I still miss my Dad every day and it's been 9 years sense he died.

 

[Old Iron]

I'm truly sorry to hear about your Dad's passing.