Endless BS thread

[SJR]

cleaning up the place

Ive been doing major clean up the last year, Ive had hauled out a few containers full of scrap mOstly car tin and parts the last load had a bunch of dirty aluminum and a stack of radiaters and a few batteries, I now have started cleaning out the shop found the floor and wells I havent seen in many years, Ive been selling stuff on craigslist as I find them and clean up, sold some old Honda 3-wheelers, sold some geo metro engines , Toyota 4x4 stuff, a tagalong bike, a lifted Subaru, a dodge dakota, a small Lathe, a drill press, a keep findins stuff and turning into cash, Its getting exciting as my shop is getting bigger as I clean, Ive been makin more dump runs then I ever had,

 

[sgtpontiac]

Make a few bucks......clean up the shop....

Sounds like a win win situation...... never know what you'll find lying around...lol [cl

 

[CR55]

Here's some more b/s.....I'm driving down a 4 lane divided highway thursday. I'm in the right lane going about 55 mph and a woman is next to me in the left lane going the same speed. Suddenly she starts drifting off the highway to the left and she hits the beginning of a steel guard rail separating the two portions of highway. Guard rail and 8X8's are flying everywhere. I stop along with another guy and we both run back to her totaled Toyota. I talk to her for a few seconds then help her out of her car... as we're questioning her she starts giggeling. Blood is pouring from her nose and she doesn't realize it's going all over her white pants and shirt! I hand her something to stop the flow and she starts laughing uncontrollably....Shock I guess....
She'e lucky the air bag went off or she probably would have been a lot worse. Never did find out why she veered off the road so quickly..she wasn't texting cause as I was helping her out of the car her folded up cell phone started ringing. As we're sitting there her sister pulls up and slams on the brakes and jumps out while blocking the entire left lane....Geeeeesh what a day!!!

 

[old man dave]

Maybe she was a nut case and did it on purpose trying to get your manly attention.

 

[Sam_Fear]

Drugs were my first and second thought. Followed by suicidal insanity. Then I woulda thought shock.

 

[Dirtyrat]

You met Lindsey Lohan??? holy crap!

 

[jfg455]

You met Lindsey Lohan??? holy crap!

now thats funny!

 

[earthman]

#712
07-01-2012, 01:01 AM
James__WC
Senior Poster

Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 922
The old Cowboy
An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake.

He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels.

After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, 'Hey, you
wanna hear a blonde joke?'

The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.

In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,

'Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, Given that
you are blind, that you should know five things:

1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.

2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.

3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.

4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter.

5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.

Now, think about it seriously, Cowboy. Do you still wanna tell that
blonde joke?'


The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters,
'No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.

 

[ratrodroy]

must be old age

When my wife speaks all I hear is WAWAWAWA I mow when the grass reaches my ankels takes me 4hrs. on a rider . My dog thinks she`s a cat climb trees after squirrels.packrats are apain in my ass cats to lazzy to chase them .But my rabbit scares them all even the wife.Rabbits a female named Sherman [ddd

 

[ratrodroy]

the only bar in town

Now thats funny Iam going to tell it at or only local bar owned by a blond chic with real cowboys this ought to go over good.[cl

 

[bob w]

A Word About Wilowbilly3

About a year ago Willowbilly3 posted a pic of a Reo cab. It is a really cool cab. He offered it for free to anybody here because it is too nice to crush.

I stepped up and said I'd take it. WB3 stuck it away last fall and saved it for me all this time.

Then reality struck. I'm too busy, gettin' too old for many more builds and too far away to go fetch the cab conveniently.

Yesterday I told WB3 all this and his response was, "No problem". Said the only bother about the deal is we wouldn't get to meet.

You all know from his posts that he is a real nice, salt of the earth guy. I'm here to tell you he is all that and more. Thank you Willowbilly for being so understanding.[cl[cl[cl

 

[Gastrick]

Very cool of WB3. Kudos. When everything is right in my world again and I make my northern tour in my rod or custom, I'd like to make arrangements to meet Bob W also.

 

[CR55]

Yes way cool!!!

 

[earthman]

WB rules. He needs to get busy on that RP tho. I am running out of patience.

 

[earthman]

I was in a pub on Saturday night. Had a few drinks........
I noticed two large women by the bar.
They both had strong accents so I asked "Hey, are you two ladies from Scotland?"
One of them screamed "It's WALES you IDIOT!"


So, I immediately apologized and said "Sorry, are you two whales from Scotland?"

That's all I remember.....

 

[maverickmk]

My wife was screaming at me: "Leave! Get out of this house!" she ordered.

As I was walking out the door she yelled, "I hope you die a slow and painful death!"

So I turned around and replied, "So now you want me to stay?"

 

[Sam_Fear]

Sometimes it's not the video, it's the intense commentary.
Double Rainbow Guy

(WARNING - This one has cursing.)
Screaming Fireworks guy

 

[sneakysnake]

Sometimes it's not the video, it's the intense commentary.
Double Rainbow Guy

(WARNING - This one has cursing.)
Screaming Fireworks guy

Those were on Tosh.0. He asked the rainbow guy if he was high.lol

 

[maverickmk]

LOL, "Bootleg fireworks!"

 

[sgtpontiac]

LMAO!!!!!

I was in a pub on Saturday night. Had a few drinks........
I noticed two large women by the bar.
They both had strong accents so I asked "Hey, are you two ladies from Scotland?"
One of them screamed "It's WALES you IDIOT!"


So, I immediately apologized and said "Sorry, are you two whales from Scotland?"

That's all I remember.....

Every time I think about it, I start laughing...can't even tell the joke to somebody without busting out laughing before the punch line......[cl